May 31, 2021
Brett Bartholomew joins Matt & Niki to discuss the art of
coaching: what is coaching and how to do it more effectively. Brett
is the author of Conscious Coaching, and you can find out more
about Brett & his work
here.
Consider experience versus exposure. Experience requires skin in
the game. You might have exposure to lifting and ideas around
coaching or business, but do you have experience doing it. An
example might be the difference between criticizing podcasts versus
doing a podcast yourself or coaching versus criticizing a coaching
methodology.
Brett works with professional athletes and has developed a knack &
reputation for working with "difficult" athletes. He enjoyed the
challenge and honing his communication and connection skills with
these athletes.
An important note, that applies to all coaches and really all
professionals, showing your client how smart you are doesn't mean
you're coaching them well: this doesn't lead to effectiveness or
connection. You need to build buy-in and trust. While technique
coaching and intelligent, personalized programming are great, they
aren't enough.
A point of discussion here is public versus private sector.
Consider D1 athletes or military service members as opposed to
people paying you to receive coaching. The former have to show up
and work as part of their job. The latter can quit at any time, and
only continue if they want to.
This leads to Brett's ideas of commitment, compliance, or
resistance. To create these categories, you need to consider the
task and relationship in the situation. Is the relationship good or
bad? Does the client appreciate or like the task or not? If both
are bad, you get resistance. If both are good, you get commitment.
If you relationship is good but they don't buy in with the task,
you get compliance.
Another factor as a coach is that one-size-fits-all doesn't work.
There are different types of clients and athletes (and, again,
there's variation within, but categorization aids understanding).
There are also coaching types, so you have to know your preferences
and tendencies. Most people learn how to coach through a
combination of how they were coached and their perception of what
is successful (what they observe).
When coaching the world-class or professional, you have to consider
the difference between behaviors and traits and how they apply to
their domain of excellence. Behaviors can be situational
(potentially in the case of a world class athlete). Traits stay
consistent. If you are truly world class at something, you will be
narcissistic in that domain, whereas if you have a narcissistic
trait that remains consistent throughout your domains of
life.
Brett also discusses some struggles he went through when he was
younger with overexercising & also finding a way to connect through
Dr. Katie.
He both wanted to avoid his home life and his friends who began
doing hard drugs. He came to compulsively exercise, and was sent to
an institution oriented toward people with eating disorders. The
treatment was similar to prison, where he had no privacy and no
choice. During this time, he felt no connection with the supposed
experts and professionals who were supposed to help him. He was
even told, as his parting, "You'll be back."
Dr. Katie finally connected with him, showing him a way to help
others and actually be effective in changing others'
behaviors.
They end by discussing marketing: how do you ethically
self-promote? Well, first, differentiation is critical. What is
your brand? How do you communicate your value? If you haven't
thought about this, or think this is below you, you still have a
brand and are still communicating your value, though not doing so
consciously.
This episode touches business and health, coaching and personal
growth, and the personal and professional. Check it
out.
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